Why is it so important to get clear about your friend boundaries (although there can be some wiggle room and exceptions)? It’s part of your time management. Demanding friends take up your time and energy for their projects or needs. And that takes time away from your projects and goals. Demanding friends make us mad – whether get angry or you’re passive aggressive.
Setting your boundaries up front will make it easier to navigate friend moods, projects and requests. Honor your own time!
Do you set boundaries with demanding friends?
Here’s one of my boundaries for demanding or tardy friends: if you’re late without a phone call, then I’ll leave after 30 minutes. A dear friend has one of her own regarding tardiness: “While waiting I’ll catch up with my own stuff, and when they arrive say 30 or 45 minutes late, I say OK we’ve got 15 minutes left, cause I’ve got to go.” In other words, don’t make your problem (tardiness) my issue.
I chatted with an evolutionary psychologist and this knowledgeable person confirms that when we get mad, especially females, we get passive aggressive. “You’re taking my resources away from me, and I don’t like it!” However, I don’t want to confront you, so I’ll get back in my own way.
Nip that behavior in the bud by making sure your friends share their resources, and time, and honor your resources and time… so there is harmony in your friend circle.
Remember… a loving and less demanding friend starts with you!
© Glenda Shaw_Superfriendgroups.com 2014
Please note: I hide specific and identifiable details in my friend stories as these stories are examples of behavior and not meant to hurt anyone. These stories are based on my opinion and perspective, except when the people written about are in the public domain. Any advice in this blog is from my insights, research and opinion only, and must not be considered as legal or medical advice.