Category Archives: Friends Confidential
I have a terrific, lovely friend, Gabby. She’s curious, wholesome, generous, loving. And, she had a really, really bizarre and funky relationship with a business gal pal. This gal pal was often mean to Gabby. To Gabby it felt like friend rejection, she was never good enough, this gal pal put her down, tells her what to do or not to do, then ignores her, ugh.
Now, I’m not your usual friend. I shoot from the hip with compassion – kind of like Judge Judy at a meditation retreat – when my friends have personal or professional issues. I don’t candy coat the issue. I’m not sentimental (although I sometimes go awwww at cat videos). I give measured, and thoughtful (my words) responses (my husband thinks I should’ve been a lawyer) to my friends. Bottom line, I love solving real friend problems, issues, puzzles, and know that this kind of friend rejection sucks.
However, Gabby’s particular friend issue was baffling to me. I was left scratching my head… until yesterday.
Fear of being alone during the holidays can be daunting. While teaching a Monday night writing class for Create Now at Camp David Gonzales, a county-run juvenile probation school and rehabilitation facility, I was told that many of the youth get upset and agitated during the holiday season. Bombarded by images of happy families, with the cornucopia of gifts resting at the base of a huge colorful tree in a snuggly living room… wasn’t part of their lives.
Some youth felt lucky, if a family member showed up for a holiday visit. But for many, their families were no-shows with excuses ranging from no transportation, too busy, no babysitter for the other children, we have to visit grandpa and can’t do both trips. So, no family member available to hug you during these holidays.
In this month’s Esquire (November 11, 2013), Tom Junod writes a revealing profile of mega celebrity, George Clooney. A significant point woven through the paragraphs is who tells a mega star the truth about their actions? George Clooney and friends. Who helps celebrities grow – regardless of your fame and fortune – rather than being their “yes” people? In entertainment, being a yes person is often a condition of employment.
Think about it, who has your back? Have you surrounded yourself with yes people or real friends who help you through life with solid advice?
George confesses that his dad delivers solid, shoot-from-the-hip advice. However, in a revealing paragraph about Russell Crowe the reader is left scratching their head wondering who